27.6.06

Eu era feliz e bem sabia

Eu era feliz,
brincava de baldinho,
fazia a lição de casa,
ia pra escola,
fazia massagem na tia,
prestava atenção na aula,
voltava pra casa de ônibus escolar,
tinha janta da mamãe,
pulava na piscina,
e mergulhava em grandes sonhos.

boa noite filha!
e a coberta me fazia ninar...

prima e tios, festas com velinha, casa cheia de gente.
almoço de domingo com histórias de papai.


Eu era feliz,
e cresci.
dava o meu primeiro beijo
ia pra escola
era do time de hand e queimada
pulava com a torcida do colégio
(e minha mãe fazia musiquinhas e pompom)
assistia tv à tarde
ia para as festinhas
me preocupava com o telefone tocar
tinha muitos amigos; amigos.
tinha muitos sorrisos.


Eu era feliz,
e quando espertinha
comecei a trabalhar
ganhei mais família, mais conhecimento
gastava tudo em diversão
via o tempo passar, enquanto achava que não passaria.


Eu era feliz
vestibular, faculdade, pessoas
um mundo que só eu conheci,
que tenho formatado aqui dentro
tudo era demais, todos eram demais
qualquer coisa era bem vinda nessa vida
a novidade que não cabia em si.
hormônios x segundos
eu trabalhava, fazia toda a questão de estar na paulista
tudo me bastava
a alegria escorria pelo ar.

Eu era feliz
e depois disso não me lembro de mais nada
nunca mais fiz aniversário
tratei de seguir a vida como ela me pediu
e vivo num quadrado escuro
bato papo com psicólogo
com rugas e muita idade


Eu era feliz, e bem sabia:
que hoje eu não seria.


neurose
desentendimento
impaciência
mágoa
egoísmo
crescimento
preocupação
desafeto
retrabalho
desvontade
decepção
desabono
erros, erros, erros
e sono, muito sono.


Eu era feliz;
e hoje, eu pararia.

19 comentários:

Anônimo disse...

Eu gostaria de parar na parte que a "alegria escorria pelo ar"...
Mas nada para, nunca!
Talvez esse seja o pq das tais "fases"...
Que tds dizem que passam... ok, entaum vai passar!
Quero mais horas de conversa besta (ou naum) como akele puppy, akela vez, akelas tantas vezes...
Saudade!
bjo gatona!

Anônimo disse...

Felicidade é regressiva. Quando mais a gente conhece o mundo em que vive, mais se julga infeliz. Daqui a 5 anos falaremos a mesma coisa dos dias de hoje: éramos felizes e bem sabíamos. Mas isso até certa idade. Depois, vestimos cabrestos e chamamos novela das oito de "diversão" e comunhão de bens de "grande amor".
E tem coisa melhor que passar por tudo isso? =D

Anônimo disse...

sim, a felicidade é regressiva mesmo, como o Fa disse... e além disso, o hoje é sempre "doloroso", pq crescer é preciso.
Ninguém disse que seria fácil. A vida continua, os dias passam e o mover dessa engranegem se torna mais leve quando temos as pessoas certas do nosso lado...
=)

ado vc.

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Письмо, можно сказать, является выраженной квинтэссенцией американской политики на постсоветском пространстве. Для тех, кто не владеет английским языком, переведу один абзац, хотя другие заслуживают не меньшего внимания. Возможно, я еще вернусь к освещению этого документа в дальнейшем.

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